TRAIN WRECK

Okay, Let me tell you about my hell - I belong to a service organization and I'm on the scholarship committee. The last time I spoke in public… on a stage…in front of 200 people was… um… in 19.... NEVER. I was miserable tonight. I had to present a “special” scholarship for a very deserving Senior at our local high school. He is in NHS, Captain of the Varsity Baseball team, and just a all around great kid. I was doing great, chatting it up with the other members of the scholarship committee, planning our strategy and then while on stage waiting to present, I was still feeling fine... riiiight up until I reached the podium. I think I blacked out. My body started to sweat, I had rivers of sweat running down my back, I thought to myself.. no I'm not going to pass out... I'm going to THROW UP. THEN? THEN? my voice revolted against my brain and started shaking so hard, it sounded like I was going to cry. I’m sure it went something like this:

Thisisaspecialshcolarshiptoanincredible individual…yadayadayada shaky voice… apology… clearing of throat…something or another about his academics and sports…(wiping sweat from my forehead) has a good heart…honored on behalf of K****** topresentthisaward to Travis S.

I can only imagine him sitting in his seat… and when I called out his name.. he was thinking.. Good Lord... why me… I have to go up and accept a scholarship from EMO GIRL? It took him what seemed like a lifetime to get to the stage, he hugged me and I seriously contemplated holding on to him, following him off the stage and dashing to my car. I was still in a full blown sweat and thought I was going to pass out. Might I mention that my hair was soaking wet from sweat and sweat was showing thru my shirt? Huh? Huh? How bout them apples? Oh... and I had to hand out 8 more scholarships after that. (Another side note to this... My boss was in the audience).

The only other scenarios that would have made it remotely worse would be if I had had a wardrobe malfunction, or if I had actully thrown up, passed out and peed on the way down.