A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT FROM MY FRIEND WENDY!

WATER...... It has been scientifically proven that if we drink 1 liter of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more than 1 lb. of Escherichia coli bacteria found in feces, in other words, we are consuming 1 lb. of poop!!
However, we do not run that risk when drinking wine (or rum, whiskey, vodka, beer or other liquors) because alcohol has to go through a distillation process of boiling, filtering and fermenting.
It is better to drink wine and talk shit than to drink water and be full of shit.

Indigestion.

This past weekend my husband was experiencing some heartburn/indigestion (probably from the shrimp we ate with extra hot cocktail sauce). At Target I bought a well known acid reducing chewable tablet. As we were driving home, I was reading the informational sheet that was provided. Among other things it states that if you are experiencing… and I quote… Bloody or black stools, you should consult a physician as you may have a more serious health condition.

I am not a rocket scientist, but if I were experiencing bloody or black stools, I wouldn’t be thinking.. hmmm… maybe I just need an antacid tablet.

Yet another potty story.

The women’s bathroom at my office is located down the hall from my office
(and also happens to be in close proximity to the galley style kitchen we all share, isn’t that great?)
This is the very same bathroom where someone “left” their underwear last week.

This morning, I went in to the bathroom and…

Oh.
My.
God.

The person who used the bathroom right before me must have had something explode out of their ass.

It smells so bad that it made my eyes water.

It smells so bad that everyone is using another bathroom in a different part of our building…..that we have to walk to… in the snow.

I just made you say underwear

I just got out of the women's bathroom in our office... and someone left their underwear (a thong no less)on the table. UNDERWEAR. Now, I'm a pretty creative thinker, but this one perplexes even me. How do you forget your underwear? Lets see.. I've got my keys, my sunglasses, my purse.. what am I missing? I made Chris go in the bathroom to double check I wasnt seeing things. Perhaps over the loud speaker I can have our receptionist say" Would the owner of the nude colored thong please come to the front desk. Thank You".

Weird

You know what is weird? Chris's ex-wife reads his My Space info EVERY DAY... and then comments to him about it. I think that is messed up. She needs to get a freaking life.

Life in Biscuit - stories from a small town girl.

The Year 2007 Thus Far.

Lets see.. it is Friday,January 5th, 2007.

My husband and I, our children and C and W spent New Years in Mexico, which by far is most relaxed I have been on vacation in a long time. More on that later ( with pics!).

Our Ecuadorian exchange son - Daniel- is being sent back home to Ecuador next week because he broke an "exchange rule"... something silly about not letting exchange students drive vehicles in the United States.. which he did... really well, right up until the moment he rolled and totalled the toyota 4-runner that his "friend" had owned for 11 days. We wont even mention that little drinking infraction. And we thought he was at swim practice. hmm...

Will dug two of the biggest holes ever on the beach in Mexico. It was wonderful for him to just play.

I love my husband. We will be married 10 years in July. Wow. Where has the time flown.